


Dressing Up

by SpyroForLife



Series: ZaDR Week 3 [2]
Category: Invader Zim
Genre: Awkward Conversations, Developing Relationship, Emo, M/M, Makeovers, Mild Sexual Content, Shopping, Shopping Malls, scene
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-20
Updated: 2020-07-20
Packaged: 2021-03-04 23:00:17
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,121
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25404247
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SpyroForLife/pseuds/SpyroForLife
Summary: About a week after Zim and Dib's relationship took a strange turn into a more intimate one, Dib decides to invite Zim out shopping, hoping to connect with him further. They have quite a bit of fun dressing up in new styles and doing each other's makeup, but Dib finds himself again trying to get through to Zim about the truth of his mission. Unfortunately, Zim still wants nothing to do with that conversation.
Relationships: Dib/Zim (Invader Zim)
Series: ZaDR Week 3 [2]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1838137
Comments: 6
Kudos: 64





	Dressing Up

**Author's Note:**

> This is for the second prompt for ZaDR Week 3, Emo/Scene! Not as confident with this one and I again sorta got away from the prompt itself, but I hope you enjoy anyway!

It's been about a week since Dib wound up sleeping with Zim to help him with his heat. They've seen each other nearly daily since, as the medicine Zim ordered never made it. Zim refused to accept that his Tallest just wanted to torment him, instead excusing it as an inability to ship it this far. Even though, as Dib pointed out, he's been able to get plenty of other supplies from Irk.

Zim had shouted at him for his suggestion that the Tallest were trying to make him suffer. And then pinned him down and quickly distracted him from the discussion altogether. Still, Dib kept it in mind. Along with all the other little things the Tallest have said over the years. He planned to have a hard discussion about it one day. For now though, he enjoyed his time with Zim, taking advantage of how relaxed he would be after sex to chat with him and get to know him better. They talked about a wide variety of subjects and Dib found that it was very easy for them to joke around and make each other laugh. Their relationship had become surprisingly comfortable and they were even more friendly to each other in public, greeting each other at school and hardly fighting at all.

It made Dib very optimistic. Maybe they could be something more than enemies. Though they of course still bickered about Zim conquering Earth, Zim hasn't said anything about any actual plans lately. It was clear he didn't have any motivation for it during heat, but maybe he wouldn't want to return to it after heat either. Dib just had to convince him of the truth of his mission. But he was patient. Zim's been here for years without conquering Earth and he certainly wasn't going to pull it off any time soon.

As they rested together after their last romp, Zim with his head on Dib's chest and Dib idly twirling one of his antennae around, Dib said, “You wanna go do something?”

“Like what?” Zim asked tiredly. He was quite worn out and happy today, as Dib had gotten him off three times before having to stop; Dib had been a quick learner when it came to his own stamina, not wanting a repeat of their first time. Once he got used to things, he was able to last for quite a while, to Zim's delight.

“I don't know. Just something,” Dib replied. “It's barely five in the afternoon. We could, I don't know... head into the city. Find something to do. How about the mall?”

“And be around crowds of smelly humans? Doesn't sound like my idea of a good time.”

“It's not so bad there. People usually don't get too close to you. We can see if there's anything cool for sale. Maybe try on some clothes. I know how much you like dressing up.”

Zim chuckled. It was a guilty pleasure of his. He may have to remain in uniform while doing his work but if he sometimes tried on various Earth clothes and enjoyed how they accentuated his body, well, no irken had to find out. “Allegedly. Mm...” He stretched, yawning as he did. “Would you dress up too?”

“Ehh that was never really my thing, but if you do, I will.”

“Good. Perhaps I can find you some better clothes than what you usually wear.”

“What's wrong with what I wear?”

“Nothing, really. Just that it's boring, you need to change up your wardrobe because you look like you wear the same thing every day.”

“Me? You're in the military and literally wear the same uniform every day!”

“That's different. You're not military so you are allowed to change it up. So get creative!”

“Fine. Take me clothes shopping at the mall then.”

“I will,” Zim snapped, climbing out of bed. “I'll buy you decent clothes myself if I have to.”

“Good, and I'll... buy you dinner!” Dib snapped back.

“Deal!”

They got dressed and Zim put on his disguise as they headed up to the ground floor. Dib found himself taking Zim's hand as they walked through the house and Zim didn't even pull it away, instead just squeezing firmly. They didn't acknowledge it until they were reaching Dib's car and they had to separate to get in.

“Wait, did you just hold my hand?” Zim demanded as Dib pulled away from him and walked around to the driver's side.

“Took you that long to notice?” Dib asked, getting in and starting the car. Zim scoffed and climbed into the passenger seat, slamming the door unnecessarily hard just because he knew Dib hated that.

“I had other things on my mind,” Zim said with a shrug.

“Like how much you probably wanna keep plowing me, right?”

Zim punched his shoulder, but it was a playful hit and he was grinning. “Shut up!”

Dib laughed and buckled up, waiting for Zim to do the same before putting the car in drive and heading into the city. “If you like me just say so.”

“Oh sure, I like certain things about you. I really think I'm gonna keep you once Earth is a smoldering ruin. Mm, yes... take you with me off this dirt ball, I can have you marked as a slave, and you'll be mine.”

“As if,” Dib retorted. “You gotta conquer Earth first.”

“It'll happen soon! You won't even see it coming!”

“Uh-huh.”

“One moment you're feeling all safe and secure, the next... bam! Massive EMP, wiping out all your primitive technology! Cars will crash, planes will fall from the sky, the Internet goes away! Chaos! And all you sad humans will be completely vulnerable when the armada swoops in and finishes you off.”

“That's quite the plan,” Dib said. “So why haven't you done it yet?”

“Eh, well...” Zim gestured vaguely and then sat back, crossing his arms. “The resources required to build a device capable of taking out an entire planet's electrical devices in one go are... substantial. Obviously I can hit the planet with multiple EMPs in different locations, but that won't have the impact I need. It's gotta be global and immediate. Mhm. But it's a work in progress. The Tallest would just have to authorize the supplies.”

“Oh, right. Like they authorized that medicine for you.”

“I told you to stop bringing that up.”

“If they can't even get one measly bottle of pills to you, what makes you think they'd send you the supplies for your EMP plan? In fact.... have they even sent you anything at all recently?”

“None of your business.”

“Nah, I'm serious. I still monitor your house, I don't think I've really seen much of anything come in from space.”

“Quit stalking me!”

“Quit threatening my planet.”

“No!”

“Then no.”

“Grr. Change of plans, when I conquer Earth, I'm leaving you here to die. You're insufferable.”

Dib took advantage of being stopped at a red light to lean over and make a kissy face at Zim. “Aww, don't be like that, babe.”

“Don't call me that!” Zim pushed his face away and Dib laughed. “I'm not your babe! Or your dear or any of those dumb cute words you creatures call your romantic partners!”

“Yeah, but you could be, if you want.”

“And why would I want that?”

“I dunno. If you're lonely? And you just want to be with someone who cares about you, who likes making you feel good and doesn't like seeing you upset, and uh...” Dib trailed off, swallowing as his heart pounded. “I'm just saying, you might like having a loved one. You've had a really hard life. I think it would be nice for you to have someone who loved you and appreciated all the work you've done.”

“Oh.” Zim looked at him with a strange gaze and then looked out the window. Dib had to look back at the road as he kept driving, but he saw Zim clutch briefly over his chest. “I don't need that. I can take care of myself. Invaders need no one.”

“Yeah. I know, you're expected to do everything on your own. I'm just saying, you don't have to. You can still choose to have someone else around, just because you like them. Because their company makes you happy. You know?”

“Suppose so.” Zim's brows furrowed and he kept staring outside. He didn't like how his heart had begun aching.

Dib decided to change the subject. “So how much longer does heat last?”

“Eh. Not much longer.”

“And will things go back to normal once it's done?”

“Most likely.”

“Then I'll just have to enjoy this time with you while you're allowing it, I guess.” Dib glanced over to see how Zim would respond to that and saw his shoulders lift.

“Yes, you will.”

Man, Dib hated when things got awkward like this. They didn't talk much more during the rest of the drive and he instead just turned the radio up to listen to his usual station. It was currently playing a pop song about ten years out of date, but he still nodded along to the beat and even lightly sang along. Zim sighed as though annoyed, but Dib saw his fingers drumming out the beat on his thigh anyway.

When they reached the mall, Dib managed to find a decent parking spot close to one of the doors and got out. Once Zim joined him, he casually tried to take his hand again. Zim yanked it away this time and Dib didn't try again. He locked the car and led the way inside.

It was fairly crowded but not the worst Dib's ever seen it. They were in the food court and Zim said, “So, you plan on getting me dinner here?”

“If you want. Or we can just go to a proper restaurant later. So, you wanna eat now, or shop first?”

“Eh, we can go shopping, I'm not really hungry at the moment.”

They went through the food court and into the main part of the mall. They looked around at the various stores and discussed where they should go first. Dib suggested Zim just pick somewhere and he would follow. Zim decided to go over to a candle store.

“Whenever GIR burns something or otherwise makes the base stink, I like to light these,” Zim explained, picking up a candle at random and popping the lid off to sniff the inside. “Sure, I can just tell Computer to recirculate all the air, but that's boring.”

“Yeah, candles are better than sterile air,” Dib agreed. “What's your favorite smell?”

“I like the ones that smell like dessert. Vanilla cookie is great. Though it makes me hungry.”

Dib chuckled. “Yeah. Me too.” He stepped further down the aisle and opened a bright green candle. It smelled like pine needles and he exhaled with a hum. “Mm. I like this one. Reminds me of the woods.”

“Oh?” Zim came over to sniff it too, then winced. “Oh, ew. Tree smell.”

“You don't like it?”

Zim shook his head. “Too, eh... earthy.”

“Well yes, trees grow out of the earth.”

Zim lightly shoved him and picked up another candle, this one red. “Ooh, cinnamon!”

Dib decided to hold onto the candle he picked. He could use more of these for his room. “So, if you don't like how trees smell, I assume you won't want to come with me when I go cryptid hunting next weekend?”

“Cryptid hunting?”

“Yeah, the Swollen Eyeballs gave me a lead on where there could be a nest of fairies out in the woods and I thought it'd be cool to go find them. See if they really can grant wishes. But if I can't find them, well. I can make a camping trip out of it at least.”

“Fairies and camping. Hmph.” Zim placed the candle down, reconsidered, and then grabbed it again, tucking it under his arm. “What a waste of time.”

“You can be all alone with me,” Dib said quietly, leaning in close. “No one around for miles. We can be loud. I know you like when I'm loud.” He walked his fingers up Zim's arm.

Zim pulled away but Dib could see him start to blush. “My heat will likely be over by then, what makes you think I'd still want to do that with you?”

“I know you aren't gonna just give me up, Space Boy. Not after you've gotten a taste of me.”

“Well don't you have a high opinion of yourself.” Zim didn't deny it, though.

“You like spending time with me,” Dib stated. “It's okay to admit it. I promise I won't tell the Tallest.”

“Hmph.” Zim went over to the other side of the store to look at a candle over there and Dib decided to leave him alone about it. He still didn't want to have that conversation and he couldn't make him.

Five minutes later, they were leaving the store with their purchases in a bag. Dib had paid for the candles. Zim had picked out three and Dib just had the pine one.

“It's crazy they charge that much for candles,” Dib said.

“Yes, business humans really do like making their money, eh?”

A few steps and Zim was spotting a clothing store. “Ooh, I wanna go look in there!” He hurried that way and Dib followed, though he began laughing when he saw which one they were approaching.

“Yeah, I don't think is your style...” he said but Zim didn't pay attention, going inside.

Zim spent a few moments browsing the racks before saying, “Meh, this is all boring.”

“Yeah, we're in a men's business attire store, idiot.”

“Oh. Well.” Zim picked up a pastel pink collared shirt and held it up to himself. “I do like this color.”

“It does suit you. But we can find stuff in that color somewhere else. Come on.”

Zim put the shirt down and followed him out. Dib instead took him over to a fashion store that overwhelmingly catered to teenagers trying to be popular, but he had to admit, he liked some of the boots and stuff in there. Seeing Zim hone in on said boots, Dib already knew which store he was going to take him to next.

“Now see, this is what I'm talking about!” Zim admired a pair of knee high boots with tall heels.

“I'd break my ankles trying to walk with those heels.”

“Hah! Your ankles are weak.” Zim began searching for his size. Once he found it, he grabbed the box and sat down right there to try them on.

Dib wasn't expecting that, but he was curious to see how the other looked in them. He waited as Zim took off his military issue boots and slipped on the new ones. Dib could tell they were a bit too wide for his feet but the length seemed okay.

“Eh, bit loose around the feet, but that's to be expected. Feels fine on my legs though.” Zim buckled them up and stood. Dib was impressed that he had no problem balancing, taking a few steps and twirling around with them. He laughed. “I like these!”

“They look good on you,” Dib said sincerely.

Zim blushed and looked away. “Of course they do. I look good in everything.” He gazed at a nearby rack of shirts. “What outfit do you think would go with this?”

“Hm...” Dib looked through the shirts and then picked one out. “Well, this crop top that says 'Juicy' in glitter across the chest has potential.”

Zim made a face. “No.” He flicked a finger against the shirt. “I like this material and the cut, I'll admit. But I don't like the word. Or this color.”

“Oh, right, my bad.” It was a neon green color that would have clashed terribly with Zim's skin. Dib put it back and instead got out a magenta shirt with no words, instead just being decorated with clusters of clear beads that resembled stars. “How about this?”

Zim brightened. “Ah! Now that's more like it.”

“You want it?”

“Ah... no, no. I would never get a chance to actually wear it...”

“At least try it on. Come on.” Dib handed it to him.

Zim shrugged and started to pull off his shirt. Dib stopped him. “Whoa. Uh, not that I mind seeing you topless, but you might want to go into a changing room for that.”

“Oh yeah. Humans are prudes.” Zim pushed his boots into Dib's arms. “Hold these while I go change.”

“Alright.” Dib went ahead and picked up the box the store's boots had been in, following Zim while he went to an available changing room and waiting outside for him.

Barely ten seconds later, Zim was coming back out, now in the crop top. “Well! This is quite revealing!”

Dib couldn't help but stare, checking out his stomach and shoulders. “Oh wow. It looks good on you though, you really have the body for it.”

“Hm...” Zim turned about, glancing down at himself. He felt his hips and up his stomach. “Strange not being covered here... But! I like it!”

“Kinda weird for you to still have those gloves on, though,” Dib said. “I don't think they match well.”

“Nonsense, gloves go with everything.”

“Yeah... not everything. I mean, if they were just on your hands, maybe. But the elbow-length ones don't work with this shirt. If you had a fishnet undershirt with long sleeves, though...” He smiled imagining that. “That could bring it together.”

“Fishnets?”

“I think we should go to the other store I had in mind.”

“Should I get these, though?” Zim pulled lightly at the crop top. “I've grown attached to it and the boots already.”

“Of course. I'll buy them for you.”

“I'm supposed to be the one buying clothes.”

“You said you would buy clothes for me. These are for you. So don't worry, I'll cover it.”

“Alright!” Zim grabbed his original boots out of Dib's arms and went back into the changing room. He put his uniform shirt and boots back on and returned to Dib with the crop top in hand. Dib went ahead and took the new boots from him, putting them in their box and carrying them up to the register.

“You sure you don't want to try on anything here?” Zim asked.

“Nah. I'll wait until we go to the other store. It has plenty of stuff I like.”

“Okay then. Because I wanna see you dress up too.”

“I will,” Dib promised.

Once he was done paying, they left and Dib led the way to the store he had in mind, which luckily was right nearby.

“Welcome to the haven for punks, goths, emos, and scene kids alike,” Dib said, gesturing dramatically. “Fire Idea.”

Zim perked and Dib was sure that if he wasn't wearing that wig, his antennae would be standing straight up. “Oh, excellent! GIR drags me here often and I've certainly admired many of the clothing styles here!”

“Yeah? Then go, put together an outfit and show it to me,” Dib said.

Zim practically sprinted into the store. He quickly went toward the back to begin going through different shirts, and Dib hung out closer to the front, browsing a few shelves of fandom merchandise. Did he want a lanyard? He really didn't need another one, but then... one could never have enough lanyards... and buttons. There were some really nice buttons here.

He pulled himself away from them though, going over toward the clothes. He examined the wall of shirt designs. There were cartoons, memes, and plenty of outdated humor. Despite how many of the shirts made him shake his head, there were still a few that he would wear.

He moved along. Ah, now here was his guilty pleasure. Pants with an unnecessary amount of buckles and pockets, huge black combat boots, intentionally tattered shirts with edgy pentagrams and blood splatter designs... yeah, he liked it all far more than he should. He checked the area for Zim but didn't see him. Hm, must have already picked some stuff out and gone to change. He returned to browsing.

While he was checking out a studded bracelet, Zim came over and tapped him on the shoulder. He turned to greet him. “Oh hey, I was looking- oh _wow._ ”

Zim was standing with his hands on his hips, a cocky smirk on his face, and Dib grew warm under the collar as he checked him out. He had found another pair of knee high boots, though unlike the ones in the first store, these made him taller with platforms rather than heels. While the main part of the boots were black, the platforms were bright pink and the boots had equally pink laces tying them on. Dib's gaze traveled up, finding rainbow fishnet leggings leading up to a red and black plaid miniskirt that he itched to dive his fingers under. He resisted the urge and looked higher. A purple t-shirt with a collar so wide that it slipped down Zim's shoulder on one side, and Zim had foregone his usual gloves for fishnet ones like Dib had mentioned earlier. These were also rainbow.

He finally reached Zim's face and saw him grinning widely. “Well, how do I look?”

Dib answered by pulling him in for a kiss. One that Zim was stunned to receive but quickly responded to. When they separated, Dib said, “Scene as fuck but you make it look amazing.”

Zim looked flustered. “W-well, yes, of course I do. Because I am amazing!”

“You would look great with eye shadow,” Dib said. “Yeah, wear all this... and put on pink eye shadow. That'd really bring the whole look together.”

“Eye shadow, well...” Zim considered, glancing through the shop toward the well-stocked makeup section. “You think so?”

“Yeah,” Dib encouraged. “Why don't you go pick one out and I'll try on some stuff I like. We can help each other put on makeup after that.”

“Okay. I used that changing room, make sure no one takes my uniform.” Zim went over to the makeup and Dib gathered up everything to make a new outfit and took it over to the changing room.

Like Zim, he changed all his clothes. His dark blue jeans were exchanged for solid black, baggy ones that he could only describe as bondage pants. Trench coat discarded in favor of a gray hoodie that he pulled up over his hair. Fingerless gloves. He took off his plain black tennis shoes and put on ankle high combat boots that wouldn't look out of place kicking the fender off of someone's car. He looked at himself in the mirror, putting his hands into the front pocket of the hoodie and slouching as he acted like he was sulking. Oh yeah. Definitely captured the look he was going for. Though there was a critical lack of something.

He opened the door and leaned out to look for Zim. He found him waiting right nearby, his chosen eye shadow in hand. Zim looked him over and whistled. “Nice choices, Dib-stink.”

“Thanks. I think I'm gonna also put on eyeliner and black nail polish but I can do that once I've bought all this. So, you like it?” He turned about so Zim could see him from different angles.

“Yes, you look marvelous.”

Dib smiled and ruffled his wig before going back into the changing room. They each pulled their regular clothes back on so they could take the new outfits up to the counter to pay, also adding the makeup they had chosen. Zim paid for everything Dib had and Dib in turn paid for Zim's stuff. Once everything was purchased, they had the various tags cut off and then headed out into the mall.

“You wanna put everything back on and then do our makeup?” Dib asked. “We can be all pretty for our little dinner date.”

Zim snorted. “It's not a date. But okay. I love these clothes, thank you for buying them for me.”

“No problem. It's nice spending money on someone else for a change. Thanks for buying clothes for me too.”

“Anything to make you look slightly more presentable.”

They went to one of the bathrooms to switch their outfits, stuffing their original clothes back into the bags. They came out of their stalls and checked each other out, then debated whether they wanted to do their makeup in here or just go sit on a bench in the mall.

They settled on a bench. The lighting may be good in the bathroom but they didn't want to be in anyone's way. They walked out and chose a good spot to sit down in, near some potted plants without any kiosks too close.

“I'll do yours first,” Dib said. Zim handed him the eye shadow and gave him a curious look as he opened it.

“Are you familiar with how to do this?” Zim asked as Dib carefully applied the powder to the application brush.

“Yeah, Gaz and I have done makeovers before.”

“Really? Never took you two for that type.”

Dib shrugged. “It's fun sometimes.” He held Zim's chin to keep his face still and began slowly applying the shadow to his left upper eyelid. “I noticed the set you bought has purple in there too. You want me to shade it on?”

“No, just the pink will be okay for now.”

“Okay.” Dib took his time as he worked, wanting it to look good. Right in Zim's face like this, he was able to smell his pheromones, which even now were still being produced. They weren't as strong as before though. He was also very aware of how Zim was staring back into his eyes, not really able to look anywhere else. Zim was surprisingly quiet too and Dib figured he just didn't want his talking to be a distraction. He enjoyed the peace between them as he put the makeup on. And after a few minutes he felt Zim's hands move to his waist and just gently rest there. He tried to ignore the butterflies in his stomach. Zim didn't love him, he reminded himself. Zim was never going to love him. He was committed to conquering Earth and likely wouldn't stop until he either pulled it off or died. It'd take a miracle for him to accept the truth behind his mission.

When Dib finished putting the eye shadow on both eyes, he leaned back and looked over his work. Zim had his eyes half-closed while Dib was working but now he opened them fully, cocking his head. “How do I look?”

“Great,” Dib replied, turning the eye shadow case around so Zim could see his reflection in the little mirror.

“Ooh! It does suit me.”

“It goes so well with your outfit too.” Dib admired how the color complimented Zim's outfit. Then he said, “You want more or is that good?”

“Nah, this is good. Thank you.”

Dib closed the case and gave it to him so he could put it back in a bag.

“Now then.” Zim beamed at him. “Want me to do you?”

Dib's poor teenage mind immediately just flew into the gutter. “Right here? Didn't know you were an exhibitionist.”

“What? I- oh, ugh, that's not what I meant!” Zim acted offended but Dib could tell he was amused. “Your makeup. You got eyeliner, right?”

“Yeah.” Dib handed it to him. “Do you know what you're doing?”

“It may come as a surprise, but I also have quite a lot of experience in applying makeup,” Zim said as he uncapped the pencil. “GIR likes being pretty. He wants me to look pretty too. He says I have quite the knack for this. So, upper or lower lids? Or both? And do you want wings?”

“Surprise me,” Dib said, hoping he didn't come to regret that decision. He took his glasses off and waited.

Zim got to it. Now it was Dib's turn to just wait, one eye closed as Zim worked on it, but the other open and looking at his face. Zim was very focused but he would occasionally look over at Dib's open eye to check on him before returning to the closed one. He worked with a smooth but quick hand, only taking about a minute to line the first eye before going to the other. Dib decided this was one of the weirdest things he's done with Zim. Forget all the bizarre battles and arguments they've had. Just sitting here quietly doing each other's makeup like longtime friends was incredibly peculiar. But it was fun too. He wanted more moments like this.

Zim finished his other eye and leaned back. “Ah! Perfect, I'd say I've improved your face 200%.”

“Yeah? Let me see.”

Zim got the case back out and opened it, showing Dib his reflection. Dib admired the thick, even eyeliner framing his eyes. Zim had chosen to go all the way around, but the line under was a little thinner while the top was heavy. Small wings curled from the outsides of his eyes. It drew one's attention to his face without being overwhelming to look at. He smiled and nodded, grinning a little at how good he looked.

“You did great. Thank you.”

“No problem!”

“Only thing for me to do now is paint my fingernails.” Dib took out the bottle of nail polish. He didn't need Zim's help for that, so they chatted while he painted.

“This has all been so much fun,” Zim said.

“Day's not even over yet, I still owe you food. You hungry yet?”

“A little. But seriously, this has been great. It's been a long time since I've just walked around and relaxed like this. It's nice not worrying about my mission for a while.”

“I bet. Everyone needs a break.” Dib waved his hand a bit to get some of the polish to dry and kept going. “I'd love to do this kind of stuff with you all the time.”

“Yeah.” Zim sighed, gazing across the mall. “It would be nice.”

Dib cautiously said, “You... could choose to live a life like this, you know.”

“No I can't. I have a very important job to do. I shouldn't...” Zim took a deep breath, but he didn't look annoyed for once at the conversation. He just seemed wistful. “I shouldn't even be doing this right now. Fraternizing with you, wearing these clothes, putting on makeup... it's so against our code. I don't know why I like doing this stuff.”

“Who knows? Sometimes you just... like things because you like them. Does it really need any more explanation?”

“If you were irken, you'd understand.”

“Well, I'm not irken. I'm a human. And we're on Earth. If you wanna be more like a human, you can. No one can stop you. This is your chance to be free. Do the things your society told you you shouldn't. You can have fun. Sing, dress up, draw pictures. Do things just because you want to and not to serve an empire that sees you as disposable.”

Zim glared at him, running his hands against his exposed upper arms as he suddenly felt cold. “If it was found out that I was doing these things... I would be severely punished. Cast out. Maybe even tried as a defect. Irkens don't just go our own way. We don't.”

“You don't, huh?” Dib finished all the fingernails on one hand and began waving them. “Well. Look at you, sitting here, doing exactly that. And nothing bad has happened. And I've learned a lot about your past. You always chose to do things your way and it caused a lot of trouble for you your whole life. You're lucky you're still alive. But if you keep pushing it...” Dib shrugged. “You were on trial for your life once. They could do it again. And you might not make it through that one.”

Zim swallowed. Dib thought he was going to get mad or leave, but he stayed there with him, taking the nail polish and gesturing for Dib's other hand. Dib held it out and Zim began applying the polish to those nails. In a soft tone, Zim said, “If I succeed at this mission, they'll respect me. They'll see how valuable of a soldier I am. It will make everything right for me.”

“What if they don't respect you, though?” Dib asked. “What if you actually pull it off, you conquer Earth, you go back to Irk. And they still treat you as inferior, mock you, push you aside and send you far away again so they don't have to deal with you? Will it have been worth it? Is that the life you want to live?”

Zim lifted the brush and sat without moving for a bit, eyes pained as he considered it. Then he said, “They won't treat me like that. I know they won't. I'll be famous and loved and everything will be perfect.”

“You can be famous and loved right here,” Dib said. “By people who actually care about you. I'll be the first. I appreciate you. You're such a wonderful, talented person and I want to see exactly who you can be. Even though you're sitting here right now in the mall with me, looking like a scene kid... you look so real. Authentic. I can see your real personality, your sense of self. Doesn't this feel good? Things can be like this all the time.”

Zim quickly swiped polish onto the rest of Dib's fingers and then capped the bottle, putting it into the Fire Idea bag it had come out of. “I don't want to talk about this anymore. Take me home.”

Surprised by the abruptness, Dib said, “Are you sure? We haven't eaten yet...”

“I've lost my appetite. Let's go. Drive me back to my base or I'll just walk back.”

“I'll drive you,” Dib said hastily. He blew on his fingernails, hoping they were dried enough, and then made sure he had all his bags and that Zim had his. Then he headed out with him. He felt a little overwhelmed with how that conversation had gone. He couldn't believe Zim had listened to him so well today, but in the end Zim had just shut down and refused to continue it like he always did. Did any of that even get through to him? Or was he just staying in denial?

They didn't talk as Dib drove him back. He hardly listened to the radio, though, too caught up in his own thoughts. Next thing he knew, they were outside Zim's house and he was stopping the car for him, putting it into neutral so the doors unlocked.

Zim swung his open and climbed out, grabbing his bags.

“So, I assume you aren't gonna want to go camping with me next week?” Dib said.

Zim stared at him for a few moments and Dib worried that he was just going to hit him. Then Zim said, “Is there a chance of you dying on your trip?”

“Well I guess there's always a chance of dying no matter what you do, but I will be out in the woods and there are bears and stuff, so... yeah, I could get killed.” Dib didn't see it as a very high possibility though.

Zim straightened up and stepped back from the car. “I'll consider going.” He spun and kicked the door shut, walking back toward his house.

Dib watched the swaying of his hips for a few seconds too long before getting a hold of himself and putting the car back into drive, going back home. No matter how many times he told himself to stop arguing with Zim, he found himself doing it anyway. He just couldn't help but hope something he said finally clicked for the other. He really did want him to be able to live a free life.

His feelings for Zim have grown so messy lately. He hadn't wanted to get too attached but he adored him even more after today. He was able to see how he was when he was relaxed, smiling and having fun, and it was such a wonderful sight. Zim's confidence and sense of humor was very attractive to him. But he got the feeling Zim was still holding back from fully letting go and being himself. Dib wanted to see him let go. Let go of the mission, let go of all that programming telling him to ignore his wants and instead serve his empire's. Maybe one day he finally would.


End file.
